horror movie opening scene

  • white girl: i dont like this abandoned insane asylum, zack.
  • white boy: come on, amanda, 10 years ago tonight, the famous blood skull killer committed his last murder right here and then vanished.
  • white girl: you're just trying to scare me.
  • white boy: lmao
  • they continue walking for a few seconds
  • *white couple hears noise*
  • white girl: babe what that??
  • white boy: i'll go investigate
  • *leaves her alone*
  • *choking noises*
  • white girl: zack!!!
  • white boy: ha ha just kidding!
  • white girl: asshole!
  • white boy: im just playin babe
  • white girl: that wasnt funny but ur still cute
  • *playful kiss*
  • *things turn sexy*
  • *hear noise*
  • white boy: i'll go investigate
  • *he leaves and then there's a silence for a long time*
  • *maybe a thud*
  • white girl: zack! this isnt funny anymore zack!
  • *she walks and he dead*
  • white girl: ahhh!!
  • *killer shows up with sickle or quirky weapon that distinguishes him from other horror movie villains*
  • white girl: ahhh!!!
  • *white girl runs*
  • *dead end*
  • *hides*
  • *thinks she free n safe*
  • *guy catches her*
  • *cuts her*
  • *she dead*
  • opening title slashes across screen: BLOOD SLICE IN 3-D
undisclosing:

when i was 3 i insisted on having this picture taken

undisclosing:

when i was 3 i insisted on having this picture taken

teamalphari:

don’t believe any boy who says “i’m not like other guys” unless he has snow-white hair, glowin green eyes and can walk through walls, disappear and fly 

beaky-peartree:

being genderfluid and pansexual means that no matter who i date, it is both a gay and a straight relationship. schrodinger’s gay.

octoswan:

there’s a comic book store in my town that gives ladies a 10% discount and the people who work there are really friendly so lots of ladies show up to hang out and buy comics and one time i was looking through some new releases and this guy walked in, saw all the ladies, did a double take, and said really loudly and condescendingly, ‘there sure are a lot of girls in here for a comic store!’ and laughed but no one else laughed with him and it was glorious

arabellesicardi:

this dog brings me great joy and eternal peace 

arabellesicardi:

this dog brings me great joy and eternal peace 

tacobelligerent:

tacobelligerent:

I STEPPED ON A FUCKING LEAF AND AT THE SAME TIME SOME KID SCREAMED I THOUGHT IT WAS THE FUCKIN LEAF OMG

why do we always have to reblog my mistakes

oktimeforplanbee:

Instagram: dropppdead

oktimeforplanbee:

Instagram: dropppdead

sniffing:

how to start a conversation, a tutorial by yours truly

sniffing:

how to start a conversation, a tutorial by yours truly

robothugscomic:

New Comic!

Pronouns, right? Super weird little lexical referents. 

My site moved to a new host, so everything should be better now! Everything -  my site, my comic, my life, my cats, my cooking, my sex. Everything. 

vicky-leee:

viridiannightmares:

I bet anyone who doesn’t know this show would think this is a legit school picture

for a second I did, but then I saw coconut head and I screamed

vicky-leee:

viridiannightmares:

I bet anyone who doesn’t know this show would think this is a legit school picture

for a second I did, but then I saw coconut head and I screamed

fluffyfit:

surimistick:

i was making a lot of mistakes and then my archery instructor said:

“you make mistakes because you’re focusing on the target and not on your actions”

and i was like woah

thanks for giving me the best life advice i’ve ever gotten

guys just think about how applicable this is to EVERYFUCKINGTHING